Divorce is never easy. Preparation ahead of time will help you avoid being caught off guard by some of the harsh realities of divorce. In this post, we’ll look at five different suggestions that will help reduce stress as you navigate the divorce process.
1. Don’t Put Pressure On Yourself To Become Friends
Being friends seems like a good idea to approach the situation amicably, but it may be too much pressure for both sides. There’s no need to force yourself to become friends during the early stage of your divorce. Forcing yourself to become friends usually creates problems when its time to get to the nitty-gritty of divorce.
Instead of forcing friendship on each other, come up with some rules and boundaries to help you navigate the divorce process. The rules and boundaries should be based on your responsibilities like taking care of your children or meeting financial obligations. It’s easier to get through these negotiations if you take a business first approach.
2. Be Prepared For Your Relationships To Change
The most challenging part of going through a divorce is how your relationships with the people around you will begin to change. Mentally prepare yourself for this ahead of time so you aren’t shocked and overwhelmed. You should expect your in-laws to side with their own family and don’t take it personally if they give you the cold shoulder.
Some people may have antiquated views on divorce and react negatively to the news. Some of your friends and acquaintances may simply forget you’re divorced and make some off-color remarks. Again, try not to take this personally. Also don’t be surprised if your mutual friends begin to disappear.
3. Consult With A Family Lawyer
Consulting with a family lawyer can help make the divorce process much more manageable. A lot of people make mistakes based on misconceptions about divorce law or advice they got from their friends. As mentioned earlier, errors in the divorce process can cost you a lot. It’s best to consult with a family lawyer who is well versed in the subtleties of divorce law.
Even if you don’t use the services of a family lawyer, it’s worth going in for a consultation. Try not to make any final decisions regarding your separation until you get some advice from a professional. A family lawyer can help you draft an agreement or even provide mediation services if you think you and your partner talk your problems out.
4. Don’t Involve Yourself With New People
The rebound relationship is one of the worst mistakes you can make, especially if you have children. If you decide to get in a relationship, do yourself a favor and keep them away from your kids. It’s too confusing for them to handle and creates unnecessary strain on your family relationships. Moving on is to be expected at some point, but at least let the ink on the divorce paper dry first.
5. Keep Everything In Writing, No Matter How Friendly You Are With Each Other
Another reason not to become friends too soon is it causes you to lower your guard. Divorce is a serious and tedious process. Even a single mistake can end up causing you a lot of hassle and extra paperwork. Not writing things down puts you in a position where it’s your word against your spouse’s. Putting everything in writing will eliminate a lot of confusion.
Writing everything down is also important because it’s tough to remember all the aspects of any agreements you come up with. Family lawyers make for excellent mediators who can listen to the negotiations and ensure everything is documented. Visiting hours, financial details and property disputes are examples of things that need to be written down.